yom kippur

[snugglekitty]

I'm not, and I never have been Jewish. However, I am a big fan of the concept of a Day of Atonement, where you sincerely say, "Yup, I fucked up. I know it and I'm sorry. How can I make it better?"

And no, these are not directed at specific people.



Forgive me for paying attention to what you were wearing when I should have been noticing what was in your heart. Forgive me for ending our conversation just because I saw someone I wanted to play with. Forgive me for overscheduling my playdates. Forgive me for being so wrapped up in my experience that I didn't tell you goodbye when I left.

Forgive me for leaving you. Forgive me for making you leave. Please forgive me for not always being present when we were together. Please forgive me for not giving you everything I had in our relationship.

Forgive me, please, for not explaining what I was doing with energy or why. Forgive me for pushing energy in your direction without your permission. Forgive me for feeding on your energy without realizing it. Forgive me for not using my Gifts on your behalf when you needed me to. I'm so sorry. I'm trying to do better.

Forgive me for not listening. Forgive me for interrupting. Forgive me for asking more of you than I could give back. Forgive me for expecting you to be there for me when I wasn't there for you. Please, forgive my distance.

Forgive me for being too wrapped up in my own problems to see yours. Forgive me for not taking responsibility for my own problems. Forgive my self-involvement, please. I'm sorry. I'm working on it.



If you want amends, leave a comment and I'll see what I can do.

Comments

[cyclothemia.livejournal.com]

this involves some introspection, on my part. I think it's something I could use doing myself... thank you for bringing it to my attention. my blog will reflect something about this in a few days.

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

Yes. I saw friends doing it last year, and thought, "Yeah. That makes sense for me." I'm glad you find it useful.

[(Anonymous)]

*hug*

Re: And so unto you.

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

It does mean something to me, yes. Your apology is accepted, and thank you.

And to you, in addition to my general statements above, I would wish to apologize for not knowing myself and my own heart better than I did then, for thoughtlessness, then and just after, and for holding you responsible for things you could not control.

When the ship lifts, all debts are paid. I wish you well.

Re: And so unto you.

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

I'd rather you didn't, actually, but I truly appreciate that you took the brave first step to initiate this conversation. Thank you for that, and I wish you a happy 2008.