Someone Else's Hangover

[snugglekitty]

You wake up in the morning with a head the size of Brooklyn. Your mouth is apparently full of moldy sawdust. Your stomach is rolling like it was an economy cabin on a cruise ship. The only thoughts that seems to make it through your brain is, "Baaaaad.... feel baaaaad" and all that comes out of your mouth are Wookie noises. All the classic symptoms of a hangover, right? Why didn't you drink water, take aspirin, and eat saltines before bed? Well, that would be because YOU DIDN'T DRINK. Not three glasses of alcohol, not one glass, not even a drop.

In short, you are experiencing Someone Else's Hangover. I know I'm not the only one this has happened to.

Maybe somebody out there has a hangover zapper. It's kind of like a calorie zapper. You know, that size zero excessively made-up blond woman at the next table at the restaurant who's eating the enormous three-course meal with extra cheese and salt on everything? She is zapping the calories from her food into your stomach while you eat your virtuous salad with oil and vinegar.

I know, there are plenty of reasonable ways to explain these symptoms, but isn't this more fun? Anyone else have an alternate, but equally silly, explanation for how this phenomenon works?

Comments

[notpiecebypiece.livejournal.com]

so you know how there are storks that accidentally deliver babies to the wrong parents? maybe there are storks that deliver hang-overs to the wrong people. I realize I just compared babies to hang-overs, but I'm actually really okay with that.

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

Hey, sure! Hangovers misdelivered by stork! Makes sense to me. :)

I think comparing hangovers with babies makes sense. Both are often the unintended result of a good time.

[chienne-folle.livejournal.com]

No, no, it's *the gods* who have a hangover, and because of it, they're not functioning at peak capacity. They meant to deliver that hangover to the next person over, but they missed and got you by mistake.

However you got it, I hope you feel better soon!

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

Heh! That's a good one.

I can also easily imagine an inebriated Hangover Fairy.

[chienne-folle.livejournal.com]

That's it! The inebriated Hangover Fairy is the best idea. :-)