how partners expand your thinking

[snugglekitty]

So - the other night, I was talking to mrpet about a crochet pattern I'd seen online. "It was a web shaped blanket," I said. He didn't entirely understand, so I drew him a little sketch on my napkin. An accurate sketch.

And it was then that I realized that, in several years of living with an engineer, some of his ability to describe and construct physical objects has rubbed off on me.



In order for you to understand how surprising this is, I think you should know that several years ago mrpet and I had a big fight because I wasn't able to communicate to him the design that I wanted for the two-layer wings I wore at our Angels, Devils, and Fae party. I knew what I wanted - I could see it in my head - but I didn't know how to talk about it except to say, "No, that's not what I mean," to everything he drew.

Finally I had to go online and find a picture of the butterfly I wanted to use as a model that I could show him. (Look at the sketch of the Hoary Comma on this page.) And he went, "Oh, okay, I had no idea that was what you had in mind!"



All of us have heard of relationships where the other person shrinks your thinking down, and they convince you that you can't do things. But in many good relationships, our thinking expands. How have partners in your life, past or present, expanded your thinking?

Comments

[dalbino83.livejournal.com]

There were a few lovers who expanded my ideas of what kinds of experiences can be hott in bed. Thank goodness for the kinky ones! :)

[tikva.livejournal.com]

I don't know about new skills, but I've become a more patient person who is able to communicate better with people who think differently than I do, thanks to my current partners.

(When I say "think differently than I do", I don't mean "have a difference in opinion", I mean "their emotional and psychological structures are very different from mine").

[fall-76.livejournal.com]

This happens to me all of the time. With friends too. It is actually the way I have been able to get through my life. My family was so dysfunctional that I didn't even have table manners or simple social graces. I had to learn by watching others. So, still to this day when I see something about someone(a way of thinking, dealing with something, acting, an energy about them) I watch them closely and try to make it my own. I think it's pretty cool!

[mrpet.livejournal.com]

Pretty soon I will have you drafting your patterns on CAD *bwa ha ha* in 3D *bwa ha ha* in full color...

Love ya!

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

Heh. I've actually used CAD before, so there!

[coraline]

In order for you to understand how surprising this is, I think you should know that several years ago [info]mrpet this page.)

is part of this sentence missing, or am i confused?

oops!

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

I missed a carat close. You're not confused. It now shows the amusing anecdote about my butterfly wings. :)