"be strong"

[snugglekitty]

So, I've been thinking about what it means to be strong.

In my family, growing up, what was validated was mostly acting strong. Pretending to know everything, be capable of everything, and need nothing. That's a really terrible model. But I'm realizing that I haven't replaced it with a new model of my own.

For you, what does it mean to be strong? And how did you find out?

Comments

[weegoddess.livejournal.com]

I take my model from the Philosophy of the Gallilian (sp?):

Being strong means that you can still do what needs to be done and love those around you, especially the folk who need it most. It means you can let go of the anger. It means that you can be kind and generous even to the ones who'll lash out in return. It means you can acknowledge the fear and know that it won't stop you.

It means being happy in your own company. And it means that you can stand up for what you know is right regardless of how other folks will react.

things that make me feel strong:

[moominmolly.livejournal.com]

* I know that I can always reach into myself and find a little bit more when I need it. Sometimes, the only thing that gets me through a rough spot is knowing that I have deep reserves, set aside in case of emergency. (The hard part is remembering that afterwards, when I'm done drawing on myself, I need time alone and love/support from others.)

* Other people rely on me when they're not sure what to do. I feel strong when people listen to me because they want to.

[water-childe.livejournal.com]

Interesting question because it's something I've been already thinking about.
I haven't been feeling very strong emotionally lately. It's come to light that I'm still working with some very bad for me outdated metrics in terms of communication and letting people 'in'. I'm still embarressed to need emotional solace because up until about 6 years or so ago, I was very likely to be rejected or told that I was (insert negative comment here) for needing that. I've become very good at diagnosing and fixing my own problems, but I still often 'hide' things from myself. The big problem is in 'hiding' stuff it compounds and then wallops my upside the head. When this happends I'm overwelmed because I know I need to ask for help but find myself paralysed with fear that I might show someone how 'messy' it is inside my emotional subconscious. I have lots of people I can call 'friend' but a non-existant emotional support group. I fear being 'needy' and fear making other feel 'put upon' by needing some talk therapy.

Although I suppose the fact that I can admit all this is strong.
I didn't used to be able to do that.

[moominmolly.livejournal.com]

I suppose the fact that I can admit all this is strong.

I certainly think it is. It's very hard for me to admit that sort of stuff to myself, and even harder to say it out loud.