a candle burnin' in my room

[snugglekitty]

Tell me about your relationship with desire.

What changes has desire made in your life? What do you do when you realize you want something? Do you see your desires as trustworthy and positive, or suspect and dangerous?

Comments

[supercheesegirl.livejournal.com]

Interesting question. I have an odd relationship with desire. (I'm going to assume we're talking about primarily sexual desire, here--and I don't think I have too many problems with non-sexual desire, as I'm pretty good with money and saving up to buy expensive things I want.)

I was raised Catholic, so I'm not "supposed to" have desires, and I think that's affected me pretty negatively. Kind of got blindsided when I first started dating--I really liked my first boyfriend, but met another guy I was very attracted to and just didn't know how to handle it. I was 14 and screwed up relationships with both of them, and sometimes I wonder if that's set the tone for all my later relationships. I've cheated on several boyfriends, and a major reason Jorn and I made it as long as we did is because he's so easygoing.

Mostly I don't trust myself when I'm very attracted to someone. The strongest attractions I've felt have always turned out to be disastrous. The guys I am less attracted to are generally better for me. I was not particularly attracted to Jorn at first.

My biggest problem now is having desires and not having any outlet for it.

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

I'm going to assume we're talking about primarily sexual desire, here

I intentionally left it open. I'm talking about desire as a force in someone's life, which can manifest in a lot of different ways for different people, although food, sex, and belief probably top the list for a lot of people.

Mostly I don't trust myself when I'm very attracted to someone. The strongest attractions I've felt have always turned out to be disastrous. The guys I am less attracted to are generally better for me. I was not particularly attracted to Jorn at first.

Mmmmm. Yeah.

An old therapist of mine said that when you have a "love at first sight" feeling about someone, sometimes it means that you have a psychic connection, but most of the time, they are resonating with your old baggage. Over the years, that has seemed more and more true. Simmering seems to bring me better relationships than a fast boil.

ps

[lady-anemone.livejournal.com]

Also, love your icon choice for this comment. Good one.